Snow Leopards, Reindeer, Squirrels, etc.

·         If I was an Atheist, I’d keep it to myself until Christmas day.  Then, once I’d opened all of my presents, I’d jump up and exclaim “HAH!, THANKS FOR THE FREE PRESENTS, SUCKERS!!!”, and out the door I’d go, arms full.  Of course, each year I’d need to find new friends.

·         I watched a show about snow leopards on PBS; it was really good.  The narrator said that in a very rare occurrence, a natural genetic aberration causes a snow leopard cub to be born with the species’ natural yellow with black spots fur, instead of being snow white.  Although they didn’t admit it in the show, I bet when this happens, at some point there’s a gathering of the other lady snow leopards, and one of them says, “she’s not fooling anyone with that mutation story”.

·         Reindeer names Santa considered but rejected: 

Dander, Spritzer,  Retsyn, Coitus, Nixon, Hummus, Tutti and Chunder.

·         There are a bunch of squirrels in my area, and it’s always kind of sad when one gets hit by a car.  I try to make the best of it.  If I see one of the little lifeless guys in the street, I make sure no one is watching, and then put a tiny pair of dark sunglasses on him.  Later, folks walking by will see him and smile in wonder and contemplate how the heck that squirrel ever got a little pair of sunglasses.  Maybe, they’ll think, he was famous.  Or maybe, they’ll think, he got hit by a car because he was blind.

·         I think 12/12/12 deserved better attention and excitement than we gave it.  And at 12:12a, admit it, you were either asleep and missed it, or maybe you were awake and simply said "cool".   No parties, no champagne toasts, no chips and dip.  Sorry 12/12/12, you just weren’t THAT special.

·         So I spend the whole week acting all superior, mocking every Mayan I see, and then I realize that the calendar in my kitchen ends December 31, 2012, so they were only off by 10 days.  I’m feeling pretty embarrassed right now.

·         Some of you have probably been watching the original Miracle on 34^th Street movie all month.  There’s a really cute scene where Kris Kringle sings a song with a little adopted Dutch girl.  Young Susan watches the little girl and Kris interact in Dutch, and begins to believe he really is Santa.

The title of the song is "Sinterklaas." The lyrics from the movie are ...

Sinterklaas kapoentje,
Gooi wat in mijn schoentje,
Gooi wat in mijn laarsje,
Dank u, Sinterklaasje.

  I have used Google Translator to learn what the song means.

Santa Claus give me stuff

Go ahead and give me stuff

Go ahead and don’t be a tightwad

Thank you, Santa Claus.

 

                          Merry Christmas, Everyone.